A Growth Mindset: 7 Ways to Help a Late Reader
Help a Late Reader: A Journey of Patience and Growth
Every child learns at their own pace, and reading is no exception. When your child struggles to read at the expected level, it can be a concern, but there are strategies and support systems that can help a late reader thrive. Here’s how you can make a difference.
My Experience Helping My Late Reader
My daughter is a late reader. It has been challenging and surprising for both of us; the struggle of learning how to read. Kindergarten was impossible. First grade was frustrating. Second grade has changed us both. She has learned to read, and we have both learned patience and perseverance. Are you seeking ways to help a late reader?
What I have discovered is that having a positive attitude and a growth mindset can really make a difference in teaching reading. Especially with a late reader, when patience can run thin, and confidence can be damaged through the process. Let me share my journey with you, to provide encouragement if you have a late reader too.
Breaking Gender Stereotypes About Late Readers
I was surprised that my daughter was a late reader. She is my fifth child, and my first GIRL.
“Just wait,” they said. “Girls are so much easier than boys.”
“Girls are easier to homeschool than boys,” they said.
“Girls do everything sooner than boys,” they said. “Girls can sit still!”
I don’t know why I ever listened to any of these stereotypes. They are not universally true.
My boys were (are) challenging to homeschool because homeschooling is challenging, not because they are boys. Some of them took to reading very easily. Some of them were a bit slower becoming fluent readers.
The difference between my boys and my daughter was that they WERE READY for formal schooling when they were 5 years old, and she WAS NOT READY.
Overcoming Kindergarten Challenges for a Late Reader
Looking back, we struggled too long on beginning phonics. She could not hold in her mind letter sounds or shapes. Her handwriting was terrible. It was hard for her to color, draw or stay interested in any learning.
She loved being read to, playing outside, playing with her 2-year-old sister and new baby brother, and going to dance class, but she was not ready for sit-down learning.
I struggled with her (with frustration, I admit) for the first semester of kindergarten. At first, I thought that she was being willful or disobedient. At Christmastime, when we were still not past -am and -an words, we took a different approach to kindergarten.
For the rest of the year, we read great books, studied nature, took care of our little kids, did simple math, and worked on handwriting and letter sounds. It was a good choice.
First Grade Struggles and Slow Progress
First grade came, and we struggled through Memoria Press’s First Start Reading and a few of the Storytime Treasure Books. She did okay, but reading was still very, very difficult. We still focused a lot on nature study, religion, read-aloud books, and math. I let her play a lot. There was a fine line between pushing her and making her feel discouraged, and I felt like I was constantly balancing the two, and often failing, leaning toward the pushing side.
Second Grade Success for a Late Reader
Second grade has been MUCH, MUCH Better for my late reader. I think there are seven reasons why my late reader is learning to read.
Late Readers Develop on Their Own Timeline
Just like kids talk and walk and ride a bike and learn to swim at different ages, reading also has a range of normal. There are many kids that can read at four (or earlier), and many that read at 10 (or later).
Just because you are an early walker or talker does not mean you will be better at walking or talking later in life. Reading is the same way. Early literacy does not always correlate with reading well, comprehension, or even liking to read when the child is older. Reading is another human development skill that will be grasped at the right time.
There are actually some very alarming studies on pushing reading and other academics too early.
From the New York Intelligencer:
Unfortunately, a growing body of evidence suggests that we might be wrong. Potentially very wrong. In fact, the most recent — and arguably highest-quality — study of early childhood education in America suggests attending a public pre-K program might make students more likely to struggle academically, skip classes, and misbehave in later grades. And other large-scale, gold-standard studies have produced similar results.
From The Foundation for Economic Education:
In 1998, 31 percent of teachers expected children to learn to read in kindergarten. In 2010, 80 percent of teachers expected this. Now, children are expected to read in kindergarten and to become proficient readers soon after, despite research showing that pushing early literacy can do more harm than good.
In their report Reading in Kindergarten: Little to Gain and Much to Lose education professor Nancy Carlsson-Paige and her colleagues warn about the hazards of early reading instruction. They write,
When children have educational experiences that are not geared to their developmental level or in tune with their learning needs and cultures, it can cause them great harm, including feelings of inadequacy, anxiety and confusion
I believe there is a range of normal when kids reach reading age, but this article and many others explore real dangers of teaching reading to kids who should just be allowed to play.
My daughter seemed to turn a corner this year, in second grade. Phonetic rules and sounding words out finally seemed to make sense to her. She was ready to learn to read. Looking back, I wish I would have just waited, but I try not to live a life of regrets.
Rest and Restart
We took a nice summer break between first and second grade. I wanted her to rest and develop good feelings about herself and learning. She is such an amazing girl, and I wanted her to play and create and soak up the sunshine. Even though we had made (some) progress in first grade with reading, I am not a formal summer school kind of mom. I am more of an unschooler in the summer, where my kids can choose to learn whatever they wish to learn, or they can play and use their freedom in the healthiest ways (limited screens, lots of outside fun, imaginary play, games, and read lots of books!).
Plus, I also needed a break. I knew I needed to evaluate curriculum choices and my own methods of teaching reading to my late reader.
Come August, we were both ready to try again. This is what we did.
The Three P’s of Helping a Late Reader
Patience
Teaching any child to read takes a lot of patience. I THOUGHT I was struggling through my first FOUR children, who learned to read in Kindergarten.
Teaching the same things over and over again for three school years has helped put things into perspective. It has required a lot of patience, and I really had to ask God’s help to get through our reading time together. I know my daughter was praying too!
Persistence
My job as a homeschool mom is to SHOW UP. Sit with my kids every day. Smile at them. Love them. Teach them. I BELIEVE in this method.
If I show up to homeschool every day, learning will happen.
My children’s job as students is to SHOW UP. Pay attention. Have a good attitude. Do the work. I believe in this method.
If they show up to homeschool every day, learning will happen.
My daughter and I exhibited a lot of persistence this year. And it paid off!
Perseverance
Learning to read was hard. It was frustrating. Sometimes we felt angry at each other. But, as time went on, reading became…….not easy…….but less difficult.
She is enjoying her reading now, most of the time. I don’t feel like running out of the room any longer. There are few tears, more smiles.
She is gaining confidence and starting to read in other places than just school (something she was NOT doing until this year). We persevered and are seeing the fruits. Thanks be to God.
Recognizing the Good: An Attitude Adjustment
When I first realized that my daughter was a late reader, I was frustrated with the process. I could only see this as a negative, as something that would hold her back. I saw how difficult it was for me, how exhausting it was for her.
I worried about her being embarrassed in front of her family, friends, or peers. I was a little embarrassed too and second-guessed my teaching skills. I wondered if I would be able to help her.
But as the year went on and progress was made, I started to see her struggles in reading and my struggles in teaching her as a gift.
Reading (and other parts of school too) are not easy for my girl. Yet, she shows up with a smile every day. She tries hard. She celebrates her wins and brushes off the bad days. Isn’t this what we want to teach our children?
She rarely complains, even though she knows her schoolwork will be challenging. The girl has grit! I see this transferred in her other work- with her siblings, on our farm, in her chores, and in her confidence. She tries new things, and she isn’t afraid of hard.
I have learned a lot about myself too. I realized that I could teach her. I can find the resources. I can sit with her through more sounding out, longer passages, new stories, new phonics rules (why does English have SO MANY silent letters? WHY?).
The best part is, we have spent so much time together. Our relationship has grown and changed into something strong. I know her, and she knows me. We have developed a lot of mutual trust and respect for each other through her learning to read. I am thankful for every minute with my girl.
A Growth Mindset for Helping a Late Reader
A growth mindset is the confidence in yourself that you can accomplish your goals. My daughter and I had to adopt this mindset to help her learn to read.
I had to let go of comparison, time, and past methods of teaching reading.
She also had to let go of comparison with her siblings and friends and time rather spent on other things. She had to bear with me and give it her all.
We both learned that we can learn and do hard things, and our reading goals were met! We will continue to work together until she can read anything, but we have made it through the hardest hurdles.
Encouragement for Parents of Late Readers
I hope this gives you encouragement if you are struggling teaching your child to read. Please stay the course, turn to God, believe in yourself and your child. Be okay with slow progress. And of course, SHOW UP to teach the reading. You’ve got this!
I hope you can also recognize your children’s struggles as a gift and that it leads to patience, persistence, perseverance- and of course, literacy!
A few of our favorite reading apps:
For more reading inspiration to help your reader and your homeschool:
Helping Your Late Reader: Best Resources for Homeschoolers
Thank you for posting this – it really encouraged me. I also have a daughter who is a late reader. God bless you and your family.
Thanks for your comment, Johanna. I know we will look back at this time and recognize it as a blessing, and I already do, most of the time. But it can be hard to stay in the game! Blessings to your family too.